Welcome to my half-assed manifesto. It’s a bit of a map of how I got to where I am, which is a place I happen to like. There’s an extremely slim chance you might find something interesting in here, which is one of the reasons I’m posting it online.
Continue reading “The Simple Guide to Relationships… or Why Love is Simpler Than You Think”
First, let’s get one thing straight. I call this The Dumbass Trifecta because I’m very hard on myself. If I engage in this behavior – in any element of it – I’m being a dumbass. I don’t care what you call it. Call it whatever you like. Call it “The Unfortunate Triangle.” Whatever it takes. Just read and see it and take note of it and please do your best to not let it ruin precious things for you. Don’t let the name of my container interfere with the message. Or, go ahead and use the name. After all, it helps me, so maybe it’ll help you.
Continue reading “The Dumbass Trifecta”
The problem with love is this: love is wonderful, beautiful, terrifying, debilitating, painful, glorious, and a joy.
The reason that’s such a problem is because people often mistake wonderful things, beautiful things, terrifying things, debilitating things, painful things, glorious things, and joyful things for love.
That’s the problem.
Fixing things is tough. Fixing social things is especially tough. People are dynamical meat systems, and capable of nearly anything.
Continue reading “The Fix Is In.”
There is a value. It is a numerical value.
It is the number of children who have been abused. It is the number of incidents of an organization covering it up. It is the number of times a priest has been moved to a parish to avoid dealing with pedophilia. It is the number of times a priest who tries to stop these incidents or begs the Vatican to stop and change their course is told to shut the hell up and pray and reflect upon what they are trying to do. It is the number of times people are willing to look the other way before they can no longer look the other way.
Continue reading ““It’s a PR problem” is the problem.”
I was joking around in another thread in response to “If I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants,” attributed to Sir Isaac Newton.
Continue reading “Let There Be Giants”
I have seen too many people get screwed by being unable to communicate (myself included). The usual pattern of events ends in something that can best be summarized by “I didn’t know what was going on.” Now me, I hate being ignorant, so I started taking a look at social interactions, with an eye toward simplifying.
Continue reading “How to Communicate”
It feels as if there’s an inverse relationship between a group’s claim at the efficacy of their self-policing and the actual ability for them to self-police.
Continue reading “We all need mirrors”
Power consolidation combined with opaqueness is the perfect hiding place for scoundrels.
Continue reading “Power is a great fertilizer.”
I think one of the greatest personal conflicts any of us has to face – and we do so on a regular basis – is the conflict between what we observe, and what we wish we would be observing.
Continue reading ““But I thought you…””
I’ve known a lot of people who seem very unhappy because they keep forgetting one of the most important relationship facts ever.
Continue reading “It’s like The Drake Equation for sex!”
I read an amusing list online a few days ago. It was a list of how not to be “creepy.” It was all the usual things, such as “don’t touch people without their permission,” and “don’t corner people when they’re alone,” and “pay attention to subtle little things like how we lift our pinkies on Thursday nights when the buffalo calls out to determine whether or not we might or might not be approachable,” and so forth.
Continue reading “We are the cops. You and me.”
I think I’m going to use Sasquatch as a metric of accountability/accuracy.
Continue reading “One Sasquatch”
There’s this sense that people are composed of discrete emotional elements that can be easily separated and encapsulated if need be.
Continue reading “Not the Sum of the Parts”
There are a lot of different essays and documents on having a civilized discussion with someone else. This is mine. I’ve updated a few things.
Continue reading “On Civilized Discourse”
Remember that thing you missed out on, years ago, and how really awesome it was and what a bummer it is that you missed out on it? I suspect it wasn’t quite as sparkly as you remember.
Continue reading “Loss Boosting”
I did not learn to cook until I was quite definitely an adult. I took one Home-Ec class in grade school, but, having a penis, was mostly ignored, or asked to make pillows in the shape of footballs.
Continue reading “Anyone Can Learn to Cook”
You’ve been in a pet store. You’ve seen the signs: “Please don’t tap on the glass.” I try to imagine what tapping on the glass of an aquarium must be like for a fish. I imagine it’s a bit like three or four cars exploding near me, maybe with an airhorn or two to destroy the high end of my hearing, too. I imagine it’s quite traumatizing.
Continue reading “Tapping the Glass”
One could say that the purpose of science fiction is to allow us to explore ourselves; where we might go, where we could go, etc. Okay, I can accept that, but what I would rather consider is the energy of science fiction. What is it trying to do?
Continue reading “It’s not looking that far forward…”
We make the mistake of thinking that people who believe in “faith healing,” “psychic surgery,” and all that other foolishness will change their minds once their children start dying. They won’t. That’s the “faith” part of the equation.
Continue reading “Is “proof denies faith” reciprocal?”