Welcome to the Petting Zoo

An Open Letter to Tortilla Chips and Coffee

Look guys,

I love you both, okay? Sometimes I need a liquid ass-kick and Coffee, you’re the man. Sometimes I need to eat something crunchy and salty and Tortilla Chips, you rule da house. It’s that simple.

You aren’t competing with each other in any way. In fact, I could have both of you at...

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The Great Creamy Eye

I admit I can be fascinated by simple things.

If I let my coffee cool in the cup, the cream kinda congeals to make this weird otherworldly pale staring eye.

Then I drink it…

…to get the powers of the Great Eye.

Apparently, some of those powers are The Power of Queasiness, however.

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