There's lots of hysteria and lots of sheep-stupid apathy surrounding the whole Y2K thing. So no one's surprised, here is what to expect:
- Some interruptions in services such as electricity
- Possible interruptions in pay (particularly for auto-deposit)
- Minor vibration in the drive train of computer-controlled ignition vehicles
- A warm feeling, alternating on your left and right brain-halves
- People may temporarily forget to use consonants between "n" and "s"
- Rashes and boils
- Frogs may enter your shower stall, humming "When Johnny Comes Marching Home"
- Toast will leap higher than normal
- Coke might go flat faster
- The planets will realign to form a pentacle. Satan will stride among us.
- ATMs might not always work.
- Did I mention boils?
- Calculations on your pay stubs (vacation, etc.) might not be correct
- The Earth will invert
- Pizza delivery might exceed 30 minutes.
- I will be crowned Fascist Dictator of the World. You will all wear bunny slippers.
- Homes with contract security services could become vulnerable
- Big-ass rashes. All over your body, man!
- Animals will buck up on their hind legs and walk as men.
- The stones off the Earth will grind us like teeth
Well, I hope I cleared that up. Can we get back to the disfigurements, now?
