Humor's just damn subjective and that's all I can say about that. Few people share my sense of humor, but that doesn't necessarily prevent me from inflicting it upon the hapless millions of upturned, cattle-like faces surrounding me.
For a couple of years, I wrote a monthly column for Exotic Magazine called The Topless Ten. It was a typical Top Ten list, but dang, it was fun to write. Even though Exotic Magazine is online, their archives aren't always very neat and tidy, so I've set up my own Topless Ten Archive. Feel free to cruise through there at your leisure. I am happy to report that one of the issues (the one pictured) featured a cover by Arthur Adams. This is the second time my work has appeared under his cover art. Wee!
One of the columns in Exotic Magazine was a collection of bogus news stories I wrote. I mean, quite literally, I fabricated them. They were simply stupid people doing stupid things. The list was entitled "The Top Ten 'What -- No Pictures?!' ER Stories of 1995" and like the rest of the magazine content, was posted online. Oh, I should point out that, shortly after writing the lists, I'd also send them out to friends via e-mail.
Then things got weird.
One day, our local newspaper, The Oregonian (motto: "If it's important to Oregonians, it's in the Washington Post"), publishes one of my bogus news stories as real news. Yoinks! Ack! Pfft! Quickly, I call the editor of that section. They smooth my feathers with a $25 contribution to the "Save Edward" fund and then they refer me to another publication -- their source for the "article".
So then I contact The Fortean Times. This magazine is one of the finest products of the British Isles and I recommend everyone read it religiously. They're all very nice and polite. They published the story with this lovely graphic (by Ed Traquino, an illustrator and a gentleman) of a woman flashing her top (the subject of the story). The editor apologized, noted that he wasn't planning on running a retraction, but referred me to the source of his story...
...The Hong Kong Standard! Now we're deep in the heart of Asia and the trail is growing colder. I finally managed to hook up with the editor who tells me they can't remember the source of the article. However, if I'm in town, they would be happy to show me their archives, which I could search (I know the day of publication). Right, next time I'm in Hong Kong...
About this time, my friend Paul Henry notifies me that I have been guilty of "propogating horseshit across the Internet" (isn't that what it's for?!). As his evidence, I am proud to present the following two searches: Alta Vista and Google, based on the names of some of the characters in the stories.
Knock yourselves out and remember that if it's digital, it's probably crap. Cheers!
